When Lou Reed wrote 'Perfect Day' he probably felt a little like I do now. Not only have I just discovered a new bottle of Cragganmore, in need of a review, but my next door neighbour has just arrived home from work. Although not normally a cause for celebration, this evenings aproach produced, in me, an overwhelming rush of joy. His enormous, black 4X4 with dark tinted windows, huge wheels and 'DESTROYER' or 'AVENGER" proudly emblazoned on every panel, rounded the corner at the end of our street with a new and unwanted logo. Messily spray painted on the side was the legend 'I'M SCARED OF PRETZELS' - a reference to the unfortunate affliction that makes Mr Brown such an entertaining party guest. Still giggling like a six year old I pour a glass of the definitive Speyside malt. Cragganmore is beautiful. Everything that makes a single malt wonderful is here; an incredibly complex aroma, a smooth firm body and a restrained suggestion of meadow herbs and grasses. As I finish the second glass I am suddenly struck by a powerful thought. Rushing up to Matthew's bedroom I violate the chaos in an attempt to find painted evidence of his misdemeanour, but to no avail. It seems I must wait a little longer for my teenage son to make his father truly proud.